Restaurant Review: River Barrel

River Barrel (160 Franklin Street, Greenpoint, Brooklyn, NY 11222)

Know when you think you've discovered something really exotic, rare and exciting? Say, Pink Himalayan salt in 2006, or a nearly dead language like Rorogwela from the Solomon Islands? The thrill extends until reality sets in, and such is the case with semi-obscurely located River Barrel on the latest "underground" Restaurant Row - Franklin Avenue in westernmost Greenpoint.

Nicely soothing salvaged wood-planked walls inside contrast starkly with a generic awning and stenciled window viewed from the outside. Unfortunately plebeian staff greet one at the door, all grim efficiency and no smiles, and everything moves downhill from here. A rare shining star is the free-trade, potent coffee ($2 a cup), but a confused and schizoid brunch menu turned us off quickly; forced to choose from a hot mess of cultural culinary signifiers, Cafe Drake and Jen Lazzaro selected the basic breakfast plate (Jen coughed up $8 for fried eggs, bacon, toast and very decent home fries) and a grass-fed beef burger (CD shelled out $11 for beef patty and fries).

Jen's generic platter was efficient if terribly unexciting, but no complaints on portions here. The burger was tolerable, made better by house-pickled cukes and yellow squash; the fries however were greasy and undercooked (a double negative).

Reasonable prices do little to elevate this latest North Brooklyn loser from the local multitude of similarly boring eateries.